Aaahhh, what a bunch of crap...
What is a bunch of crap? Ahh, well, this and that.
I remeber driving along during the vacation and mentioning to the lovely wife that you would think or hope that given time away from the place you spend so much of you life and given time to just sit and think you would come up with something. You know, figure shit out and stuff. Like what you would do different, or what is wrong that needs to be made right... stuff like that. Then you come back to the real world and are ready to kick some ass, not take it anymore, fight the good fight, or quit.
I was hoping that I would suddenly remember what it is I always wanted to do with my life. Suddenly have that bright and shiny moment where I figured out how to make all the money I need, be happy doing it and how to execute this in a quick and efficient manner. Or at least suddenly develop the balls to tell the overlord where to go and make a grand statement with my actions.
Heh, but damn, it is soooo easy to fall right back into that ass groove here on my chair. Right on back to the old habits and squashed soul.
Oh, don't pity me, it ain't that bad, but I feel that I am just floating a bit too much, waiting for something to happen... and here's the thought that I had this morning, perhaps instead of waiting for something to happen I should MAKE something happen. Like, Dude, you can't wait for a cake to fall in your lap, you gotta make the cake, you dig... WOW, ain't that a breathtaking discovery... but, see, the problem is, and the reason I have been just kinda floating along, is probably because of my ninja training, it takes a lot out of me, but also because I am a lazy bastard and for the life of me I can't think of anything to DO... Hell, I can't think of what I want for dinner, how can I think of something I wanna do with my life... perhaps I should write things, how about that... ok, so I am... now I just need someone to pay me for it, like randomly stumble across my ramblings and say, HEY, that's genious, and he's a ninja, I think I will pay him to be a genious ninja for me... now how many zero's are in a million again? (at least 6 for those of you keeping score)...
I figure that wouldn't be much different from when I was a professional lover... now I am a retired professional lover, not getting paid for it, you dig, but a PRO, yo... you know, getting paid for what I do for free...
I don't know, I wonder what it would be like to have someone wanting 5000 words on schedule or deadline or something... I remember what it was like in college, something about drinking heavy and staying up late the night before something was due... hmmnn... I think it would be different this time. I think I do better NOT drinking heavy and perhaps getting UP early... but really, someone calling me up and saying "gimme 5000 words on traffic in Seattle" and then being able to crank it out... hmmm...
Speaking of traffic in Seattle, there was some crap in the paper sunday about traffic in Seattle, or drivers in Seattle, or something... Damn, bitch and moan... get tired of hearing about the crappy drivers around here... and there are tons of them, and I know (I am admitting it here) that I become a bitchy driver at times, not being patient or friendly or something... but damn, there are some downright BAD drivers around here... And I have to believe it is deliberate. I don't think that it is completely just brain dead mouth breathers who are responsible, I think it is all people who know better but are gonna be pricks either because they feel entitled or because they want to make an exception just this once...
OK, so say I am in the Carpool lane, which is the far left lane, which is sometimes called the fast lane, and I am doing 65 in a 60. Someone comes up on me from behind and is riding my ass because they want to go faster, but I am already going over the limit, eh... I should get out of their way, I really should, assuming there are only the 2 of us on the road and there is no real reason for me to be in the fast lane... but assume I am in the carpool lane because traffic is uber heavy and I am passing everyone in the normal lanes... why the hell should I get out of someones way just because they want to go faster than I do? Why should I be going 80 just so they are not riding my ass... I would not be the rude one in this situation, it would be THEM... ultimately, noone should be riding someone elses ass if they are going over the speed limit, or at it, or at least, they should be expecting that they are going to get slowed down...
Merging??? yeah, you bastards that run the lane until it ends and bust in front of everyone else at the last minute, like, say on I-5 where the right lane ends up around the southcenter hill... or you assholes that want to exit 405 to get to Renton or Kent and try to get in the line of cars just before the exit starts, despite the fact... despite the fact... Aarrghghghg...
Feeling some frustration right now... mostly because this is all in my imagination and should not matter in my "REAL" life, you dig... more and more this life is infringing on my "REAL" life... or I am just pretending that the two are not reversed... Back to the sea with me, I say... would be good to be barechested and feeling the ocean spray from the hull of a schooner as I cross the equator... rum and buggery, thats the life for me... and tattoo's... buggering women with tattoo's... oh, I am so confused...
Go HERE and dig on the Dresden Dolls... Girl Anachronism is freaking me out lately...
I remeber driving along during the vacation and mentioning to the lovely wife that you would think or hope that given time away from the place you spend so much of you life and given time to just sit and think you would come up with something. You know, figure shit out and stuff. Like what you would do different, or what is wrong that needs to be made right... stuff like that. Then you come back to the real world and are ready to kick some ass, not take it anymore, fight the good fight, or quit.
I was hoping that I would suddenly remember what it is I always wanted to do with my life. Suddenly have that bright and shiny moment where I figured out how to make all the money I need, be happy doing it and how to execute this in a quick and efficient manner. Or at least suddenly develop the balls to tell the overlord where to go and make a grand statement with my actions.
Heh, but damn, it is soooo easy to fall right back into that ass groove here on my chair. Right on back to the old habits and squashed soul.
Oh, don't pity me, it ain't that bad, but I feel that I am just floating a bit too much, waiting for something to happen... and here's the thought that I had this morning, perhaps instead of waiting for something to happen I should MAKE something happen. Like, Dude, you can't wait for a cake to fall in your lap, you gotta make the cake, you dig... WOW, ain't that a breathtaking discovery... but, see, the problem is, and the reason I have been just kinda floating along, is probably because of my ninja training, it takes a lot out of me, but also because I am a lazy bastard and for the life of me I can't think of anything to DO... Hell, I can't think of what I want for dinner, how can I think of something I wanna do with my life... perhaps I should write things, how about that... ok, so I am... now I just need someone to pay me for it, like randomly stumble across my ramblings and say, HEY, that's genious, and he's a ninja, I think I will pay him to be a genious ninja for me... now how many zero's are in a million again? (at least 6 for those of you keeping score)...
I figure that wouldn't be much different from when I was a professional lover... now I am a retired professional lover, not getting paid for it, you dig, but a PRO, yo... you know, getting paid for what I do for free...
I don't know, I wonder what it would be like to have someone wanting 5000 words on schedule or deadline or something... I remember what it was like in college, something about drinking heavy and staying up late the night before something was due... hmmnn... I think it would be different this time. I think I do better NOT drinking heavy and perhaps getting UP early... but really, someone calling me up and saying "gimme 5000 words on traffic in Seattle" and then being able to crank it out... hmmm...
Speaking of traffic in Seattle, there was some crap in the paper sunday about traffic in Seattle, or drivers in Seattle, or something... Damn, bitch and moan... get tired of hearing about the crappy drivers around here... and there are tons of them, and I know (I am admitting it here) that I become a bitchy driver at times, not being patient or friendly or something... but damn, there are some downright BAD drivers around here... And I have to believe it is deliberate. I don't think that it is completely just brain dead mouth breathers who are responsible, I think it is all people who know better but are gonna be pricks either because they feel entitled or because they want to make an exception just this once...
OK, so say I am in the Carpool lane, which is the far left lane, which is sometimes called the fast lane, and I am doing 65 in a 60. Someone comes up on me from behind and is riding my ass because they want to go faster, but I am already going over the limit, eh... I should get out of their way, I really should, assuming there are only the 2 of us on the road and there is no real reason for me to be in the fast lane... but assume I am in the carpool lane because traffic is uber heavy and I am passing everyone in the normal lanes... why the hell should I get out of someones way just because they want to go faster than I do? Why should I be going 80 just so they are not riding my ass... I would not be the rude one in this situation, it would be THEM... ultimately, noone should be riding someone elses ass if they are going over the speed limit, or at it, or at least, they should be expecting that they are going to get slowed down...
Merging??? yeah, you bastards that run the lane until it ends and bust in front of everyone else at the last minute, like, say on I-5 where the right lane ends up around the southcenter hill... or you assholes that want to exit 405 to get to Renton or Kent and try to get in the line of cars just before the exit starts, despite the fact... despite the fact... Aarrghghghg...
Feeling some frustration right now... mostly because this is all in my imagination and should not matter in my "REAL" life, you dig... more and more this life is infringing on my "REAL" life... or I am just pretending that the two are not reversed... Back to the sea with me, I say... would be good to be barechested and feeling the ocean spray from the hull of a schooner as I cross the equator... rum and buggery, thats the life for me... and tattoo's... buggering women with tattoo's... oh, I am so confused...
Go HERE and dig on the Dresden Dolls... Girl Anachronism is freaking me out lately...
posted by Catfish at 2:01 PM
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