Gawd Damnnitt...

Just walked into the friggin bathroom... I should know better, but I had to pee...
I need to call someone...
Dude in there, grunting and grunting, sounding like a gorrilla or something... GRUNT!!!
Then heavy breaths... huh huh huh...
Then GRUNT!!!!
Then huh huh huh...
I peed faster than I ever have before, but delicate, you know, like a friggin gentleman...
Zip it and bust a move to get out before something bad happens...
I just get the door open, 10 seconds from freedom, and suddenly the dudes O ring busts out - KapOWWW!!! SPLAT!!!
Dammit... for real... Dammit all to hell...
At least it has replaced the Wicked soundtrack echoing in my head... but WHY, dear lord, WHY???

I am going to start using the womens room exclusively, since there are only like 5 girls on this floor or something, but I bet you could have a row of 20 stalls all filled with the ladies, they could all be crappin at once, in unison, you dig, and I bet it would sound like the morning, like with birds chirping and the dawn slowly breaking... all peaceful like... Oh, and smell like baby powder... yeah...