It was great...
So I totally go all oiled up last night. It was FANTASTIC.
I made sure to wear my man panties, you know, to show a modicum of decency, but somehow I ended up getting my butt all greased up. I thought it was an accident at first but then she started talking about how most peoples problems revolve around the fact that they have too much tension in their asses and she told me she was going to do something special and there were some big words being thrown around, most of which I didn't understand but I believe I did hear the word colon 5 or 6 times. She told me to relax and take it like a man, which I thought was kinda odd.
I was totally relaxed and couldn't see a thing because of the little pillow she had me put my head in, but I thought I saw some flashes of light every once in a while. Anyhow, she kept pushing and pulling on my muscles and at one point I heard her whisper something like "oh my"... not like you just dropped something, but more like that seen in Bull Durham after Crash went on and on about long kisses that last a week and shit... Oh My!!!
She was dumping more and more oil on me, really getting it all over the place, you know, and all of a sudden I saw stars. I wasn't sure what was going on at first then I realized that she had stuck her finger up my butt...
Long story short, she commented upon how flexible I was and suggested I come back...
I felt great when I left, full of energy and all loosey goosey, you know...
Was driving through Covington and thought about what I had said yesterday about picking up some stray and trying to work a freebie out of her... Had my eyes out, I was feeling all sexy... Didn't see much going on, saw some scruffy looking dudes at the 76 station, thought they might be looking for some excitement, but then I started thinking about My Own Private Idaho and decided against it...
So I decided to take it on home, you know, why go out for dinner when you got a whole fridge full of cold cuts, eh? So I got home and it was all quiet and warm, could hear some people having a party next door, gentle breeze was blowing, sexy sexy night...
Noone was home, I was all alone...
I went into the kitchen and got big glass of ice water... took it into the living room and got myself down on the floor. I reached for the remote control, felt it all hard and cool in my hands... I closed my eyes and hit the big red button. I could hear the gentle hum of the tv turning on and the gentle cheer of the crowd, the crack of the bat... ooohh, runners on first and third, yeah... the pitcher winding up, gripping the ball, he lets it fly...
Ahhh, high and outside... full count... yeah... Heres the wind up, and the pitch, YEAH!!! got him standing, strike three, retires the side... ahhhh....
I took a long cool drink of water, worked some of the ice out of the glass into my mouth... took the ice and started rubbing it on my neck and chest... the water beaded up on the oil... my man boobs were all tingly... I reached over to my left and grabbed a towel, clean, just washed, felt the rough cotton in my hands, turned it over and over, and folded it... mmmmmmmm... I put it next to me and reached for another, I folded it first one way then the other into a perfect square... aaaaaaa... I put it on top of the other one, or maybe I put the other one beneath this one... One was on top of the other and they just layed there... I reached into the pile... OH!!! a washcloth... and another one... OH YES... there must have been 6 or 7 of them... eeeeeee... I folded each one, slowly and luxuriously. If I had been any one of those washclothes I would have been in heaven at the gentle folding I was giving them... Soon... far too soon... the towels were all folded, but I wasnn't ready to stop, I was just getting warmed up... I reached into the pile and found a pair of jeans... ROUGH ROUGH jeans... I layed them out on the floor, gently but deliberately lined up the seems... smoothed them out... shook them out, you dig.. let them know I was in charge... then I folded them once... gently patted them... then quickly folded them again... BAM!!! Yeah... them jeans were folded like they would never forget...
I smiled to myself, closed my eyes and reached into the pile... my fingers closed around something... Oohh, whats this?!? I pulled it out of the pile and peeked through my eyes... OH, it was a shirt... I don't fold shirts... They go on a hanger... sigh... I through it over a chair... I closed my eyes and reached in again... Uhh, uhh... a sock... hehehee... nice soft clean tube sock... hhhhhh... Oh, but where is its match... can't just have one sock... where is its mate??? This wasn't right, I started getting frantic... desperate for it... I had to find the other sock... I ripped through the pile, I found another sock, but it wasn't it's mate... couldn't put them together... found another... and another... but couldn't find the sock that I could put together with this sock... I kept digging, deeper and deeper into the pile... where is it... it has to be here somewhere... got.. to.. find... the... sock... YES... OH YES... thats the spot, there it is... it was clinging to a goddamn shirt... I peeled the sock off the shirt, tossed the shirt over the chair... held one sock in my right hand, held the other in my left hand, and slowly brought them together... Angels sang... it was perfect... I folded them together and put them next to the pile of towels and washclothes... all of them, right there together... I sat back and just kinda watched them, the were oblivious to me in their folded glory... I couldn't take my eyes off them... I reached out and found the glass of icewater and was digging around in it for another piece of ice to rub on myself... when I heard something...
Someone was rattling the door... SHIT!!! I took my hand out off the glass and grabbed the remote control and started punching at buttons hoping to find a good combination...
Got the channel changed just in time as the family came running in... I tried to look innocent, like nothing was up... but it had to have been written all over my face, I mean, my god, there was a whole pile of folded laundry, just laying out there in the open...
Luckily noone noticed... whew... I got away with it... that was close...
I played it all off, non chalant like, but I was glowing inside... my own little secret... noone would ever have to know...
HEHEHhheee... I am still glowing... and plotting... I think I might have the house to myself tonight... and I happen to know there is a pile of clothes in the dryer just waiting for me to reach in and grab them... OH, DUDE!!! there are some DIRTY clothes in the hamper... dirty dirty clothes... they don't know what they are in for tonight!!! I am gonna stuff those clothes in the washer and cover them with soap... they are gonna get agitated and spun around, they won't know what hit them... then, when they think they are done I am going to pull them out, all sopping wet and comingled and TOSS them in the dryer, let them roll around and around and around... then, when they think it is all over I will gently pull them out and fold them... piles and piles of folded clothes all laying there...
I am voracious that way... and, you know what, if I find that I have the time, I might get a little kinky, maybe cross over to the other side, wink wink... you know what I mean... as long as I can get away with it and noone EVER finds out I think I might do some dishes... SHHHHhhhh...
I made sure to wear my man panties, you know, to show a modicum of decency, but somehow I ended up getting my butt all greased up. I thought it was an accident at first but then she started talking about how most peoples problems revolve around the fact that they have too much tension in their asses and she told me she was going to do something special and there were some big words being thrown around, most of which I didn't understand but I believe I did hear the word colon 5 or 6 times. She told me to relax and take it like a man, which I thought was kinda odd.
I was totally relaxed and couldn't see a thing because of the little pillow she had me put my head in, but I thought I saw some flashes of light every once in a while. Anyhow, she kept pushing and pulling on my muscles and at one point I heard her whisper something like "oh my"... not like you just dropped something, but more like that seen in Bull Durham after Crash went on and on about long kisses that last a week and shit... Oh My!!!
She was dumping more and more oil on me, really getting it all over the place, you know, and all of a sudden I saw stars. I wasn't sure what was going on at first then I realized that she had stuck her finger up my butt...
Long story short, she commented upon how flexible I was and suggested I come back...
I felt great when I left, full of energy and all loosey goosey, you know...
Was driving through Covington and thought about what I had said yesterday about picking up some stray and trying to work a freebie out of her... Had my eyes out, I was feeling all sexy... Didn't see much going on, saw some scruffy looking dudes at the 76 station, thought they might be looking for some excitement, but then I started thinking about My Own Private Idaho and decided against it...
So I decided to take it on home, you know, why go out for dinner when you got a whole fridge full of cold cuts, eh? So I got home and it was all quiet and warm, could hear some people having a party next door, gentle breeze was blowing, sexy sexy night...
Noone was home, I was all alone...
I went into the kitchen and got big glass of ice water... took it into the living room and got myself down on the floor. I reached for the remote control, felt it all hard and cool in my hands... I closed my eyes and hit the big red button. I could hear the gentle hum of the tv turning on and the gentle cheer of the crowd, the crack of the bat... ooohh, runners on first and third, yeah... the pitcher winding up, gripping the ball, he lets it fly...
Ahhh, high and outside... full count... yeah... Heres the wind up, and the pitch, YEAH!!! got him standing, strike three, retires the side... ahhhh....
I took a long cool drink of water, worked some of the ice out of the glass into my mouth... took the ice and started rubbing it on my neck and chest... the water beaded up on the oil... my man boobs were all tingly... I reached over to my left and grabbed a towel, clean, just washed, felt the rough cotton in my hands, turned it over and over, and folded it... mmmmmmmm... I put it next to me and reached for another, I folded it first one way then the other into a perfect square... aaaaaaa... I put it on top of the other one, or maybe I put the other one beneath this one... One was on top of the other and they just layed there... I reached into the pile... OH!!! a washcloth... and another one... OH YES... there must have been 6 or 7 of them... eeeeeee... I folded each one, slowly and luxuriously. If I had been any one of those washclothes I would have been in heaven at the gentle folding I was giving them... Soon... far too soon... the towels were all folded, but I wasnn't ready to stop, I was just getting warmed up... I reached into the pile and found a pair of jeans... ROUGH ROUGH jeans... I layed them out on the floor, gently but deliberately lined up the seems... smoothed them out... shook them out, you dig.. let them know I was in charge... then I folded them once... gently patted them... then quickly folded them again... BAM!!! Yeah... them jeans were folded like they would never forget...
I smiled to myself, closed my eyes and reached into the pile... my fingers closed around something... Oohh, whats this?!? I pulled it out of the pile and peeked through my eyes... OH, it was a shirt... I don't fold shirts... They go on a hanger... sigh... I through it over a chair... I closed my eyes and reached in again... Uhh, uhh... a sock... hehehee... nice soft clean tube sock... hhhhhh... Oh, but where is its match... can't just have one sock... where is its mate??? This wasn't right, I started getting frantic... desperate for it... I had to find the other sock... I ripped through the pile, I found another sock, but it wasn't it's mate... couldn't put them together... found another... and another... but couldn't find the sock that I could put together with this sock... I kept digging, deeper and deeper into the pile... where is it... it has to be here somewhere... got.. to.. find... the... sock... YES... OH YES... thats the spot, there it is... it was clinging to a goddamn shirt... I peeled the sock off the shirt, tossed the shirt over the chair... held one sock in my right hand, held the other in my left hand, and slowly brought them together... Angels sang... it was perfect... I folded them together and put them next to the pile of towels and washclothes... all of them, right there together... I sat back and just kinda watched them, the were oblivious to me in their folded glory... I couldn't take my eyes off them... I reached out and found the glass of icewater and was digging around in it for another piece of ice to rub on myself... when I heard something...
Someone was rattling the door... SHIT!!! I took my hand out off the glass and grabbed the remote control and started punching at buttons hoping to find a good combination...
Got the channel changed just in time as the family came running in... I tried to look innocent, like nothing was up... but it had to have been written all over my face, I mean, my god, there was a whole pile of folded laundry, just laying out there in the open...
Luckily noone noticed... whew... I got away with it... that was close...
I played it all off, non chalant like, but I was glowing inside... my own little secret... noone would ever have to know...
HEHEHhheee... I am still glowing... and plotting... I think I might have the house to myself tonight... and I happen to know there is a pile of clothes in the dryer just waiting for me to reach in and grab them... OH, DUDE!!! there are some DIRTY clothes in the hamper... dirty dirty clothes... they don't know what they are in for tonight!!! I am gonna stuff those clothes in the washer and cover them with soap... they are gonna get agitated and spun around, they won't know what hit them... then, when they think they are done I am going to pull them out, all sopping wet and comingled and TOSS them in the dryer, let them roll around and around and around... then, when they think it is all over I will gently pull them out and fold them... piles and piles of folded clothes all laying there...
I am voracious that way... and, you know what, if I find that I have the time, I might get a little kinky, maybe cross over to the other side, wink wink... you know what I mean... as long as I can get away with it and noone EVER finds out I think I might do some dishes... SHHHHhhhh...
posted by Catfish at 8:58 AM
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