I smell real good and my back is oily...
Hey, I'm on my new computer, look at me...
Ok, so you know how I was telling you that I was going to the spa with my team from work? Yeah? No?
Well, somehow before I showed up my team did something fantastic and they won something, I am not really sure how it came down, but all of a sudden my boss (X-Khan) tells us we are going to the spa and do we want a facial or a massage... Heh..
So, that was today. The plan was that we would leave at 11 and go the Purple, which is apparently a wine bar. There was a lot of wine there so I have to believe them. Anyway, me and the dude that sits next to me and this chick that sits across the way, we walked up there, took the long way around because we were idiots or something, but we got there ahead of all the people that drove, so there. Anyway, we get there and they tell us to go upstairs and into the back and so we did and there was the biggest friggin table I have ever seen up there and it was really cool. We all sat down and ordered wine and they brought appetizers (horse de overies) of that cheese wrapped in filo dough and baked (damn that stuff is good) and some pita bread that we were supposed to spread this dippin' stuff on... it was ok, except for the red dippin' sauce... I got to listen to many amusing conversations, but me and the dude that sits next to me (who was sitting next to me) just kinda sat there... he was being shy, I think, and I was just listening and plotting... and I think I was kinda nervous about the massage I was gonna be getting...
See, I had never gotten a massage before... You know, professionally... I was thinking about it, see, I had always told people that I needed to maintain a steady level of stress and was worried that I might lose my groove is someone fucked with that... Hell, I had a million excuses really, but to be honest (perhaps) I think it might have something to do with having some strange person touching me for money... running their oily fingers through my pelt, you know... some people don't dig the pelt for some reason... although, the ones that do enjoy the pelt are the best people in the world...
Anyhow, we walked and talked on the way down to the spa and the dude I was with was telling me about his last massage and how he was sitting around naked with this robe on and all these hot masseuse gals were walking around and they would come and get you and dry your feet because you had been soaking them in hot water and something, and he was all full of anticipation or something and all of a sudden this guy (Paul?) came for him and he ended up being naked and getting a massage from a dude... I thought about his story trying to figure where the problem was, then I figured he was a little something something about having been manhandled... hmmnn, I was not especially worried about some dude rubbing all over me... I don't think, I don't know, I just remember wondering about it...
Like, was I just supposed to strip down naked when I got there? Would we all be sitting around naked with robes and drinking champaign, me and my co-workers??? Oh, it went on and on...
Well, before I tell you that, let me tell you, Belltown is full of friggin' wasteoids... Holy Shit, I never seen so many people walking around stoned... I mean really really stoned... all slitty eyed and walkin' slow and definately high... it was wild...
This dude went up the the dirty hippie I work with and asked for change, right, and the dude I work with was all like, why the hell would I give you any change, you got money for cocaine, so why would I give you some change, and they dude was all like, whaaattt? and the dude I work with told him he had a white circle around his nostril from snortin something, and the dude was all like, oh yeah, shoot... and went walking away (wiping his nose)...
Anyhow, this is really getting long, so let me say, I drank champaign all swanky like out of a cup that looked like one of those old jam jars, I didn't get to see any of my co-workers naked, I didn't get naked myself, kept my man panties on (yeah, I wore panties today since I was concerned, you dig) and had one hell of a fantastic massage... only lasted half an hour, but I can definately see why people would do that...
Anyway, I was making some small talk with the gal that was rubbing me and I asked her if she gave massages because she loved people, and she said no. She did it because she could make more money working part time doing this than she could working full time doing something else...
Then I told her about the Jesus blog and tried to explain about what it was and stuff, but I don't think I did a good job. She asked if I meant the Jesus from the bible and I was like, yeah, but he is like a normal dude that just does things... and she was like, what? and I told her about the cape and giving high 5's and how he had a lamb named Karen and stuff, but there was just something missing, like I was insane or she was not amused, I don't know... but I did my part, you know, tried to spread the word... whoa... does this mean I have a relationship with Jesus now? hmmnnn...
Oh, and I think I might be sick... my throat hurts, but my lovely hawt wife says it might be from the massage... I think it is because the dude that sits next to me infected me because my throat was sore this morning and I feel all phlegmy.. flemmy... runny boogery down the throaty... damn...
Ok, so you know how I was telling you that I was going to the spa with my team from work? Yeah? No?
Well, somehow before I showed up my team did something fantastic and they won something, I am not really sure how it came down, but all of a sudden my boss (X-Khan) tells us we are going to the spa and do we want a facial or a massage... Heh..
So, that was today. The plan was that we would leave at 11 and go the Purple, which is apparently a wine bar. There was a lot of wine there so I have to believe them. Anyway, me and the dude that sits next to me and this chick that sits across the way, we walked up there, took the long way around because we were idiots or something, but we got there ahead of all the people that drove, so there. Anyway, we get there and they tell us to go upstairs and into the back and so we did and there was the biggest friggin table I have ever seen up there and it was really cool. We all sat down and ordered wine and they brought appetizers (horse de overies) of that cheese wrapped in filo dough and baked (damn that stuff is good) and some pita bread that we were supposed to spread this dippin' stuff on... it was ok, except for the red dippin' sauce... I got to listen to many amusing conversations, but me and the dude that sits next to me (who was sitting next to me) just kinda sat there... he was being shy, I think, and I was just listening and plotting... and I think I was kinda nervous about the massage I was gonna be getting...
See, I had never gotten a massage before... You know, professionally... I was thinking about it, see, I had always told people that I needed to maintain a steady level of stress and was worried that I might lose my groove is someone fucked with that... Hell, I had a million excuses really, but to be honest (perhaps) I think it might have something to do with having some strange person touching me for money... running their oily fingers through my pelt, you know... some people don't dig the pelt for some reason... although, the ones that do enjoy the pelt are the best people in the world...
Anyhow, we walked and talked on the way down to the spa and the dude I was with was telling me about his last massage and how he was sitting around naked with this robe on and all these hot masseuse gals were walking around and they would come and get you and dry your feet because you had been soaking them in hot water and something, and he was all full of anticipation or something and all of a sudden this guy (Paul?) came for him and he ended up being naked and getting a massage from a dude... I thought about his story trying to figure where the problem was, then I figured he was a little something something about having been manhandled... hmmnn, I was not especially worried about some dude rubbing all over me... I don't think, I don't know, I just remember wondering about it...
Like, was I just supposed to strip down naked when I got there? Would we all be sitting around naked with robes and drinking champaign, me and my co-workers??? Oh, it went on and on...
Well, before I tell you that, let me tell you, Belltown is full of friggin' wasteoids... Holy Shit, I never seen so many people walking around stoned... I mean really really stoned... all slitty eyed and walkin' slow and definately high... it was wild...
This dude went up the the dirty hippie I work with and asked for change, right, and the dude I work with was all like, why the hell would I give you any change, you got money for cocaine, so why would I give you some change, and they dude was all like, whaaattt? and the dude I work with told him he had a white circle around his nostril from snortin something, and the dude was all like, oh yeah, shoot... and went walking away (wiping his nose)...
Anyhow, this is really getting long, so let me say, I drank champaign all swanky like out of a cup that looked like one of those old jam jars, I didn't get to see any of my co-workers naked, I didn't get naked myself, kept my man panties on (yeah, I wore panties today since I was concerned, you dig) and had one hell of a fantastic massage... only lasted half an hour, but I can definately see why people would do that...
Anyway, I was making some small talk with the gal that was rubbing me and I asked her if she gave massages because she loved people, and she said no. She did it because she could make more money working part time doing this than she could working full time doing something else...
Then I told her about the Jesus blog and tried to explain about what it was and stuff, but I don't think I did a good job. She asked if I meant the Jesus from the bible and I was like, yeah, but he is like a normal dude that just does things... and she was like, what? and I told her about the cape and giving high 5's and how he had a lamb named Karen and stuff, but there was just something missing, like I was insane or she was not amused, I don't know... but I did my part, you know, tried to spread the word... whoa... does this mean I have a relationship with Jesus now? hmmnnn...
Oh, and I think I might be sick... my throat hurts, but my lovely hawt wife says it might be from the massage... I think it is because the dude that sits next to me infected me because my throat was sore this morning and I feel all phlegmy.. flemmy... runny boogery down the throaty... damn...
posted by Catfish at 7:46 PM
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